We've Moved...

HI!

I know you haven't heard from me in a while and now here I am to tell you my blog is moving. =-(

If you have enjoyed my blog please add this to your reading list...

www.chelseeandbilly.blogspot.com

Hope to find you are still following me there! ♥

hanging in there...

Well.

Life happens. We get sick we get busy and our toes get horribly infected. shit happens. I believe it is all how you want to react to it.

Billy and I did not work out the last 4 days! I know and we were doing so well.

My toe is aweful. I can hardly walk on it. Let alone work out every night.And Billy doesn't want to do it on his own so.... we are dealing. I want to just bite the bullet and do what I can (I could at least do abs..)...he wants me to wait...and my toe is so bad I kind of want to wait until it heals as well. I just started my antibiotics so I will give it one more day and then Billy and I will hit it hard again.

It is weird too because Billy right now is totally in a place right now that I have definetly been. He is upset at himself because he started out strong...he wanted to accomplish something and help me and now I am a gimp which is throwing a wrench in our plans so he is getting discouraged and wants to just stop completey and restart again when my toe is better. Basically he wants to give up and start over at another time. Oh man I have been there so many times. so so so many times. The thing about weight loss and living healthy is that you can't just give up the first time something goes wrong or you will never get to the end. We can still pick up where we left off. We can still succeed.

But I know how he feels.

so for now all I can really say is we are hanging in there. Here is our 10 day weight/measurements update. no pics for now sorry!

Billy---before is blue and current is purple---

Weight: 210lbs 213

Measurements:  

Chest- 43.5  43

Waist- 40  39

Hips-39   39

Thighs- 26  24

Arms-13  12.5

Me =-)---before is blue and current is purple---

Weight: 189lbs 187lbs

Measurements:

Chest- 40  40

Waist- 35   35

Hips-42   40

Thighs- 24  24

Arms-12  11

Well until next time, 

Soaking it all in...

I am doing so good. Wait. WE ARE DOING SO GOOD!

It is day 7 of Billy and I doing the Shred and I am at 5 out of 7! I was sick and attempted (and failed) to do it. And Billy sat out one of the days I couldn't do it but holy cow! I have never been so committed! I love working out with my husband. I think I would be a skinny mini if I had started out this way in January. ♥

People at work keep telling me how great I look and I cheated and peeked at the scale this morning and it says 186lbs down from 189lbs! If that is true that is 3lbs this week! I hope It isn't just water weight moving around lol. We will see on Monday the 11th, which is our official next weigh in and pic post before we move onto Level 2 of the Shred! Another proud moment for me is my perseverance! I don't know why this embarrasses me so bad but it does so please just bare with me...

I had two ingrown toe nails and I finally had them taken care of yesterday and I still did the Shred and will STILL DO the shred all weekend. I looked up some alternate work outs for the ones I can't do because of the bad toes and I am so excited at my will to keep on truckin! I can't wait to see the results at the end of this 30 days.

Today I meant to do a good long blog but I have speant most of my lunch break catching up on some of my fave blogs. Being sick has really put me behind this week! =0)

So until later this weekend....

Keep on keepin on! You still have 12 weeks to make that FINAL push for your goals you made at the beginning of the year!

What will you do today to put you that much closer?

Much Love,

October Shred Day #2

Well I am happy to say that I have never been happier for this entire journey! Here I am on my 10th month of working on myself and I finally found what makes me happy and energized. My husband is doing it with me.

Gosh I  love love love him!So right now we are working on being more active over all and we are also doing the 30 day shred (yes again...) but we are determined to get through it for 30 consecutive days.I believe we can do it together. He wants to do it in the evenings which is hard for me because I tend to procrastinate it when I save it until the end of the day. However I believe that having us hold each other accountable to get it done will help. And Oliver is not an excuse! The last two days we did it when he was awake and he just smiled and laughed at us. Also working out with Billy is fun! He energizes me and causes me to push myself harder. And he makes me laugh and feel playful. I am just loving this. I really hope it lasts. He really wants to lose some of the weight he has gained since we got married so I hope it sticks. man...did I mention I love love love him?

So tonights entry is really a place for our 'Before' pics and measurements. I am so glad he let me take his too!

Weight: 210lbs

Measurements:  

Chest- 43.5

Waist- 40

Hips-39

Thighs- 26

Arms-13

10/01/2010

9/13/2010

 So even though I am still not happy with the way I look. I think that I have improved a bit...the 2nd set are September at the begining of my first Shred Challenge... my muffin top looks slightly less muffin-ish. (just slightly...) Also here is a comparison of my weight measurements...

NOW

Weight: 189lbs

Measurements:  

Chest- 40

Waist- 35

Hips-42

Thighs- 24

Arms-12

9/13/2010

Weight: 

190lbs[

Measurements: 

Chest: 39

Waist: 35

Hip: 42

Thigh: 27

Arm: 12

So there we have it! Until next time! Look for some seriously exciting posts coming soon!

Much Love,

I ♥ Billy

Sorry for my short absence. I have been going through a lot lately! =-(

Never fear I am back though. I am happy and content and ready to just lose this weight already! And the best part of all is that...so is my husband! I have been wanting his support and help with this journey since day 1 and he is finally ready to help me and get into shape himself! He is actually going to do the 30 day shred with me! I can't wait! We start tomorrow. And we are going to do it every day. No interruptions. Also he has made a change in his life and realizes that he wants to live a more active life style which I soooo appreciate because I do too and it has been a fight to get him to do things like go for a walk or play a game or go to the park or learn a new crazy dance lol.

So the Shred! We are doing it! Every morning for the rest of October! Beginning tomorrow. Why is it so hard to do something every day? Something always comes up and distracts me or lets me believe I can't do it but really I can. I just get to make the time and now I have my wonderful husband to hold me accountable. I can't wait until tomorrow morning. He makes me laugh and pushes me to be better so I know we will have fun while doing it.

So that is it for now. I felt like I was going crazy the last couple weeks. My emotions are a total roller coaster since I had my son. And the reality is that every once in a while I just get depressed and unmotivated. And that lasts a little bit and then it is like I wake up and I am myself again. I know I really need to sort that out. My friends and husband just believe that I get to work more on the 'loving myself' part of my journey. I just am not sure how to do that. I know that following through with my commitments and goals even when I am feeling all 'doom and gloom' is a huge part of it.

Working out and eating right makes me feel good. The effort that goes into it is the hard part. So until next time...I am still striving for my goals. I won't stop until they are reached.

Thank you for being here with me for the journey!

Much Love,

Making Healthy Choices...

Dear Jillian Michaels,

Do not worry my dear, I am still at it. I am on Level 3 of your 30 day shred and it SUCKS. My abs hurt...muscles I didn't even know that I had hurt. And I am not gonna lie. I have not finished the complete 20 minutes. I will though. Tomorrow I go all the way. All in!

Thank you for a quick 20 minutes of hell to wake me up in the morning!

Love ya girl...

Momma

LOL. If only she knew that I turn the sound off because her harping drives me crazy and I can't stand that yucky techno work out music...eeek. I realized this morning I didn't post my pic for the Drop Dead Gorgeous by December challenge yesterday as I usually do! Don't laugh at me I have been messing with this pic for too long and I can't get it to flip around! So turn your head sideways for me please...

(sheepish smile...)

Thank you!
Well do your best today and I will make sure that I do my best. I have many things that I am working on but fingers crossed I will get some progress pics out tonight and be able to take my measurements!

Have a great day!

much love,

Monday Madness

I feel...crazy today. I know I have accomplished a lot, and still I have a ton to get done. What I am mad about is my progress! Week 1 of my 16 week journey was a half-flop. I ate well, kept my calories down. I didn't even have a pumpkin treat. (but I baked pumpkin muffins today so I will be having one today.) The flop part is this... I didn't work out one time. I have a...well a ratard toe at the moment....and am ashamed to say that it totally kept me from doing anything. luckily my toe is feeling much better today so I plan on going for a good walk with my husband and doing the shred. Today is the last day of level 2. Which sucks because I missed about 5 days of it.

Oh well.I am not going to hate myself. I am just going to keep moving forward. Keep eating well...and working out and striving for 3lbs this week. I know I can do it.

I have figured out that drinking water is key to my eating well. When I stay hydrated I find that I don't want to snack as much. Also my hands swell in the hot weather and drinking a ton of water helps to keep the swelling down a little bit. =-)

How much water have you drank today?

Tips and Tidbits/I Can I Will

So I am still committed. I will be drop dead gorgeous by December 31st 2010. In fact I am not sure I have ever been more committed. I was looking through some old posts for some tips!  (PS no idea why the pic quality sucks so bad!) I wanted to reaffirm though... I CAN I WILL DO THIS IN 16 WEEKS!

I got a ton of good info when I first started figuring out what was right for me in the beginning of my weight loss journey and not many poeple were following me at that time so I wanted to repost them. I definetly needed the refresher!

1.Take the dieting out of your 'diet'- get rid of simple sugars when you can, cutting out one 12oz pop a day will help you to lose up to 15lbs a year. get rid of eccess salt, saturated fats, syrups, trans fats, white flour. All this can be accomplished by reading the labels of the food you are eating. Don't go all food Nazi on yourself either or you are bound to relapse. From everything I have read it seems there are no foods that are BAD BAD BAD, you just need to practice the rule of moderation and be conscious of your food choices.
2.Trick yourself- Use a smaller plate Doctor Oz reccomended 9" on his show, this will help you to keep your portions smaller. They say that if you eat 'red spices' for breakfast it will actually make you less hungry later in the day. Brush your teeth after each meal, food never sounds as good with toothpaste breath!
3.Slow Down- Eat more slowly. Sometimes we eat so fast that we end up filling ourselves more than we need to. Eat 1/2 of what is on your plate and then wait 10 minutes and evaluate how much food you really NEED.
4.Keep Busy-I eat out of boredom a lot of the time, I have found when I am busy and I keep the TV off I eat a lot less.
5.Drown Yourself- I read that sometimes when you think you are hungry, really you are just dehydrated. Drink as much water as you can and you will notice your snack cravings become less. It is recommended that you drink half of your body weight in ounces. for me that is 80oz.
6.Stay Away From Fast Food- It has been proven time and time again that it just isn't that good for you. I hope to be giving this up...almost entirely until the end of this year. It's just 16 weeks how bad can it be?

7.Oh Man the Omega's!- I read on Chris Pirillo's website that Omega 3 and Omega 6 supplements help you to curb your hunger if taken 20 minutes before a meal. (allowing you to eat less, not to starve yourself)

8.Go Public- I heard this tip on every talk show doing specials on weightloss, and on every website I went to yesterday. One important detail is to NOT SAY YOU ARE ON A DIET...we all know how those turn out. Don't set yourself up for failure. Simply let people know that you are working on a healthier life. Let them know of your goal and ask for their support. I will admit that sometimes those closest to us are the biggest sabotagers of our success though. I mentioned that I had a healthy lunch and breakfast yesterday and then Billy came home and we had hamburgers w/ pork and beans. I get to be strong with my husband and really let him know about the changes I am attempting to make in my life. Usually when I stand my ground I end up being a good influence on him....
9.Weight Game- the experts say that you should weigh yourself at the same time everytime your do it so that your numbers will be consistant. Also I do not recommend weighing yourself daily, for me it becomes more discouraging because it seems like no progress is being made.

10.Goals- We all have a goal in mind when we decide to eat healthier and become more active. Break it up into smaller goals. Each time you meet a goal amp it up a bit! What you want wants you more than you want it!

One thing that really enlightened me though was a quote from Chris Pirillo's website.
"If you don't like the way that YOU are then YOU are going to have to do something about it."

Weigh in/ Setting new goals...

So I weigh 190lbs (from 186lbs about 11 days ago). It is a little aggravating. I don't know if it is because I have been putting on lots of muscle or what with doing the shred... because look at my measurements...by the way I had to have done something wrong last week my thigh was totally NOT 40 it couldn't have been because it is 27 now and somehow my chest has grown as well... maybe I am not taking measurements right. who knows.

about...11 days ago...

Chest: 36

Waist: 35

Hip: 42

Thigh: 40

Arm: 13

now...

9/13/2010

Weight: 

190lbs

BMI: 

28.89- overweight

Measurements: 

Chest: 39

Waist: 35

Hip: 42

Thigh: 27

Arm: 12

So I am frustrated. Jillian Michael's is kicking my ass...my self esteem is like a roller coaster I feel good and then bad and then good and then bad...and I am slowly realizing how much I have screwed myself. When I started this journey I was all about moderation. I didn't want to go all in. Eating perfectly working out EVERY damn day...that was too much for me so I did the bare minimum and I screwed myself. I thought I could find balance in eating 'ok' part of the time and still treating myself sometimes and working out the bare bare minimum. But that really hasn't gotten me too far. I am mad at myself. I have had 9 months to do this and look at me! I weigh 190 which means to get to around 145 I still have 45lbs to go. It makes me want to cry. 

ahhhh....But I am not going to. Because luckily for me this was never really about the '#' on the scale at the end of things. No for me this has always been about liking what I see when I look in the mirror regardless of what the scale says.  I am still going to strive for that number as a way of getting results. Here are my new and improved goals. 

Goals from now until December 31st, 2010

I have 16 weeks to love what I see when I look in the mirror. 

I have figured to do that I need to lose about 45lbs. 

That means I get to lose about 3lbs a week or about 12lbs a month. 

I am not even sure if those kinds of numbers are possible. But I have to shoot for something. Now I need to make some goals to achieve those numbers! I am already doing the Jillian Michael's 30 day shred but now I need to step it up. I let myself indulge WAAAAY too much. I need to be vigilant. Extra vigilant as the holidays are upon us. I am going to keep to a strict 1300 calorie intake with one delicious pumpkin food each weekend. (I am only human!) So here is how I hope to achieve this...

1 hr or more of working out every day-yes even weekends. (30min in the morning...30min in the evening.)

1300 calories a day- 1 day a week I am allowed an extra special pumpkin treat (because well pumpkin flavored goodness is the 3rd love of my life.--it goes Billy-Ollie-Pumpkiny Goodness)

Drink at least 80oz of water a day. (I have heard that it is supposed to be half of your weight in oz so that is where that number came from)

I found these pics of fun, radiant, energetic moms...so ultimately this is my goal. I want to be able to do this ALL the time! ♥

 So I know this has been a long post. But I just wanted you to know that I am not going to let myself or you down. I want to prove to myself that I can say I am going to do something and then do it. I want to open up that stupid box of skinny jeans. I want to RUN a 5k or maybe a 10k...I want to take my boy on long bike rides and play in the park. I want to show him there is more to life than eating and watching television. So stay tuned in. Keep encouraging me like you have been it really does mean the world. Also your feedback is ALWAYS appreciated on what I can do better or more of. 

Much love...

The Versatile Blogger Award- me really?♥?♥

I feel so special. Molly over at fluffy girl gave me an award! It is....The Versatile Blogger Award! I have seen it on some of the blogs that I read and it makes me feel so happy inside that now I have it too!

Now the award has some "to do's" attached...
1. Thank the person that gave you the award.

      Molly- I am so excited that you decided to give one to me! I receive tons of encouragement from you and you are just an amazing girl so it means a lot that you thought of me!

2. Share 7 things about yourself

     1.I am the mother of the cutest little man around--- Oliver♥ (10 months)
     2.I have never stuck with anything as long as I have stuck with this blog and I am loving it!
     3.My favorite colors are purple and green.
     4.I love the show Pushing Daisies...I want Chuck's wardrobe!!!
     5.Something I used to like to do in my spare time was make my own purses...I need to get back to that!
     6.My two favorite movies are Say Anything and Wayne's World
     7.I love music of all kinds but my all time favorite song is 'The Joker' by Steve Miller Band 

3.Nominate 15 other new blogs for the award.

I am having trouble with this one. I will do a post a little later about my nominees. I am not sure that I read enough blogs...so I need some time. 


Anyways I feel special! Stay tuned for Weigh In and Measurements...dun dun dun!

Much Love,

I am HaPpY hEaLtHy and RaDiAnT

I am Happy Healthy and Radiant....

and I will absolutely be Drop Dead Gorgeous by December (http://www.halfofjess.com/). I  have just been...busy and preoccupied the past few days so I apologize for my absence! How about some updates?

I love that word radiant! that is what I picture when this journey comes to a close in Decemeber...well not a close but slows down a bit as I bask in my accomplishment. Radiance. Just a bright happy faced HEALTHIER me in a new cute outfit running around chasing my cute boy with out being completely worn out. yes...radiant. ♥

Starting Weight:

184lbs-- 186lbs

(I actually gained two lbs! But I am doing the 30 day shred and I am told you may gain a bit at first....I hope that is all it is!)
Goals from now until December:

1.Lose 39lbs

2.Become a more active, healthier, more vibrant person.

3.♥Love what I see when I look in the mirror♥

4.Open my box of skinny clothes

5.I will not be doing the 5k. However I do want to start incorporating more cardio in my work outs so that I can one day get to that point.
One brag from this week:

I am on day 8 of the 30 day shred. I did miss one day but I made up for it with two work outs the next day! woo hoo for consistency! ♥
One thing to improve upon for next week:

Get outside! It is getting cooler here in Vegas. So no more excuses. I finally get to become the bad mother runner I want to be. Or at least let myself see if I like running.

Well there you have it! I am doing well keeping up with all of my challenges! I am proud of myself. I have been waking up early. I only missed one day of the shred but I made up for it. I need to find out if that kicks me out of the challenge though! eeek!

Well. My eyes are wanting to shut I need to pack it up and go home to my boys. I plan on doing some blogging tonight though. I want to really get focused tonight and create a plan around all these wonderful 'By December' goals. I know what I want now I get to go get it! woot woot!

Much love,

Weight & Measurements

Here it is folks. Here is what we are working with. 

Scary I know. 

But it is important for me to gather before photos so that I can compare them to my ♥'after'♥ photos later on.  

Weight- 

186lbs

Measurements-

Chest: 36

Waist: 35

Hip: 42

Thigh: 40

Arm: 13

Photos-

 Front: (I look sad because my husband was impatient and wouldn't let me retake it with a smiling face)

Side: 

Back: (eeek)

So there you have it! I have a ton of work ahead of me. But look how far I have come...

Can't wait for more results! 

Until next time! 

Much love, 

Shred Challenge Day 1....

So. Today is Day 1 of the Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred Challenge from one of my new favorite bloggers- Syl at http://www.livesmilerun.com/.

The challenge is simple...Complete the video- 20 minutes a day for 20 days. 10 days on level 1, 10 days on level 2, and 10 days on level 3. Track your progress along the way, weigh yourself, take a picture and take your measurements every 10 days.

(A bonus is that by entering the challenge and completing it I get my name in a drawing to win a prize and get my blog mentioned on Syl's website, a blogger that I admire immensly so of course I want to win!)

I have been 'trying' to do this video for 30 consecutive days forever now and I am so determined to do it this time! I am very very excited about this! =)

Not only that I am excited about the oppurtunity I have given myself. I set a goal at the beginning of this year to lose 70+lbs by the end of this year. I have lost about 36lbs...so now is the hard part. My life style hasn't completely changed yet. I get to really live what I have been reading about the last 8 months. I get to really make the shift that is necessary to get the results I want.

I will post my 'before' pics tonight as well as my measurements and a recap of my goals as I think I have been kind of scattered the last couple of weeks.

Until tonight....♥

don't want to forget this feeling...

I want to bottle up the way that I feel today and keep it in my pocket for when I need it again! Because sadly I know that my inner Gloria- gloomy face will show her ugly face sometime soon....

I did so good yesterday and today (so far) and I just feel good! I feel energized...I feel proud of myself...I feel like there isn't anything that I can't do and like the world is my wonderland.

Who would have thought that waking up at 4:40 in the morning would make me feel that way? I can tell you that most mornings when that 4:30am alarm goes off and I snooze continuously until I HAVE to get out of bed at about 5:20-ish I do not realize what I am giving up! A sense of accomplishment and happiness and contentment and drive and focus on my goals.

Hopefully I can keep this up, especially with my Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred challenge starting tomorrow.
We shall see how powerful my desire to sleep is vs. my desire to be happy. You never know at that time of morning.

So my friend Alena is cute and wonderful and she was telling me this morning her affirmations for the day and I decided to let her in on the Drop Dead Gorgeous by December challenge! I am not sure how often she will be participating with me however she is just the best and I wanted to make sure that I shared! =)

Starting Weight:
175

Goals from now until December:
140
One brag from this week:
I resisted cookies and cake all week

One thing to improve upon for next week:
Drink more water

Anyone else that wants me to post their Drop Dead Gorgeous by December Challenge photo, I would be happy to do so! =) Also make sure that you send it to http://www.halfofjess.com/ as well! =) That is where this amazing inspiration came from! =)

mOmMyHoOd iS BeAuTiFuL BiTcHeS!

even with the puffs in my hair, baby on my hip, honorary pj's uniform, spills, slips, booboos, tantrums and dirty diapers...I know that mommyhood is beautiful.


Starting Weight: 
184lbs

Goals from now until December: 
1.Lose 39lbs 
2.Become a more active, healthier, more vibrant person. 
3.♥Love what I see when I look in the mirror♥
4.Open my box of skinny clothes
5.Do the 5k in September

One brag from this week: 
I dusted off the ol' elliptical today and actually USED IT! It was fun.

One thing to improve upon for next week: 
Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred...DO IT ALREADY!!-----I joined a blog challenge to complete this. I start officially Sept 1st. 

My Big Why

For those of you that read my blog regularly you prob have noticed and been frusterated just like I have about how I have been having trouble keeping on track lately. I got to have a bonus day (we didn't have a sitter) with my son yesterday and WHEW! He is 9 months old and man o man does he wear me out! It made me realize that he is the main reason that I started this journey in the first place.

yep. this little guy the 2nd love of my life...

Becoming healthy became important to me after having him because I know that to be a good parent I need to love myself. So that I can teach him that he gets love himself and think positively about himself. I also get to be healthy and happy so that I am around as long as possible to show him 'the way'. (kind of like yoda eh? LOL) But really my cheeseball self aside...my little Oliver is my BIG WHY.

What is your big why? I want to hear all about it!

Much love,

No more snowballs!

I know that is an odd picture since it is summer and all but I realized something yesterday about myself and I am sure most of you have been through this as well. I work in an office that has a potluck every month. Every month someone is smart and brings healthy options like a salad, some grilled chicken, fruit, veggies that kind of thing.  (usually everything else is like a contest to see who can bring the most fattening, tempting and unhealthy things...which I contribute too as I always bring a dessert since I like to bake LOL) Every month I tell myself before the meeting that I will only eat the healthy things. I generally like to save my indulging for when I am with my husband since he doesn't ever eat healthy. But EVERY MONTH I say oh well just one piece of fried goodness or one dish of ice cream and ugh...before I know it that one little indulgence has snowballed into two plates of all bad stuff and I didn't even eat one healthy thing!
That is how it works with me. I can't just stop with 1 m&m that whole bag is going to be gone before I even have to time to think about it. So now that I am aware and conscious of this fact I get to do something about it. I know that I feel better when I eat better. I know that it is just my mean, fat alter-ego 'Gloria' talking when I want to snowball into wayyyyy too many calories. So now I get to sharpen my skills of saying NO! Not even just one.

Because we all know it is never just one.

I AM Powerful Bitches!

So a blog that I read regularly (http://www.molly-fluffygirl.blogspot.com/) had a GREAT post this morning from another blogger that I read regularly (http://www.halfofjess.com/)! It had a great challenge on it. I challenge you to do it as well! I also reccomend both of the blogs above. I have been very short on inspiration lately and these blogs have helped me a number of times. As Jess says on her blog...

prepare to be inspired....

Starting Weight:

184lbs

Goals from now until December:

1.Lose 39lbs

2.Become a more active, healthier, more vibrant person.

3.♥Love what I see when I look in the mirror♥

4.Open my box of skinny clothes

5.Do the 5k in September

One brag from this week:

I am an organized person, my house is clean, I have a budget created...I ROCK!

One thing to improve upon for next week:

Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred...DO IT ALREADY!!

Weigh In Day

 So I still weigh 184lbs.

Honestly I don't know what I expected! My eating habits are shit and I just can't seem to find the motivation to change them. Well I have the motivation...I mean I want to get skinny I think what I am really lacking are the balls if you will!

I read an article recently about Nutritarians and it all made sense. It felt so insanely right as I was reading it... I was dumbfounded. I seriously think that a plant based diet is right for me...however I come from a home where we eat junk food and junk food and more junk food. There are only two of us. And I know my husband isn't going to start eating well in fact he has told me that he is going to eat what he wants. And he does most of the cooking...so where does that leave me? Going around in circles like this is causing me to do nothing instead of something. Maybe I just need to bite the bullet and say sorry husband but I am going to eat good and well even if that means we eat/cook seperate meals.

Another thing that has been bothering me is that I have lost 32lbs damn it. I feel like I am the only one that recognizes this.  I don't want a lot of attention and saying this may sound vain but I think I expected poeple to watch me as I went through this journey and congratulate me and tell me I look good. I must not look good though becuase the people that see me every day have never said a thing.

I suppose the point of this post is that I am figuring out that I need to look to myself for commitment and motivation and I need to keep myself pumped up with my own encouragement. So CHEERS to me and all that I have accomplished so far. I have until December to shed these last few pounds and really turn my life around.

I think I expected that by about the half way point it would be easy. Well it's not easy but I am going to do it.

Moving Forward

I am constantly moving forward. I have one question for myself today....

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO TODAY TO GET

CLOSER TO REACHING MY GOALS?

I am going to go for a walk with my husband tonight and hit the treadmill in the gym at my apartment complex. I am going to give this whole 'running' thing a go.

Runners are hot. They are motivated...energetic and sassy. I want that. I think that I just need to quit making excuses and complaining and do it. I have been reading all of these blogs about people that are running and they seem like they have so much purpose. I have been silly thinking I could really reach my 70lbs lost goal by doing the bare minimum. That is getting me nowhere. In case you haven't noticed I haven't even lost weight in a couple of weeks. I am just maintaining.

So today to get closer to reaching my goals I am going to run. I don't know for how long. But I am going to do it.

♥

Searching for... something

I have been so... in the pits lately!


The sweaty nasty pits. Ugh. Blegh.


So I decided to take a good hard look at my life and why I was making myself so unhappy and then...FIX it! Yay!


If only it were really that easy!

I did however come up with a plan and I already feel ten thousand million times better. ( I heard a little boy on TV say 'a thousand million...' and I can't stop saying it! So cute!) I had a good talk with my wonderful husband and I am ready to take control of my life...of my attitude and my general mental condition. My hormones have really put me through it since having my son and I am sick of it. So here is the plan.


Well first let me explain this a little bit.


First I thought of what I really want in my life. What is really going to make me a happier more fulfilled person.

Balance.

I desperately need to balance everything in my life. Otherwise what will my weightloss success be worth if my life in general is a mess? I I like to use affirmations to help me reframe negative thoughts and energy so I made a HUGE affirmation for my life and posted parts of it all around my house to keep me focused on what is important. So most of what I want is spoken in affirmations. Which means in a nutshell Instead of just saying I really want balance in my life. I call out to the universe and I tell it. "Hey! I am balanced!" Because I know that my thoughts create my universe. So I have learned to think powerfully. From there I just thought about what I needed to work on to achieve that balance. And here it is.....

 I just thought of what I wanted and then I broke it down from there.... 

I AM ACHIEVING BALANCE AND PEACE IN ALL AREAS OF MY LIFE!

I am HEALTHY.

I am getting in shape.

I take loving care of my body.

I put effort in every day to feel cute and presentable.

I eat the things that give me energy and vitality and allow me to move forward with my goals.

I am ORGANIZED.

My home is a cozy, loving haven from my family. It reflects the things that are important to us.

My home is clean and organized.

My bills are paid, on time each and every month.

Billy and I are on a well planned functioning budget.

We have all of the worldly things we need.

I am at PEACE with my EMPLOYMENT.

I am at peace with my current working 'role'.

I am doing something that I enjoy.

I am able to provide for my family.

I am doing all that is necessary to improve my family's quality of life.

I am a LOVING FRIEND/WIFE, and MOTHER.

Oliver gets the best of my attention.

I am an active listener. I give my love and attention freely.

I have a fun, open, and honest relationship with my husband.

I let my husband know each day how much I love and appreciate him.

Affirmation for today.../...Weigh In

I AM A HEALTHY, RADIANT MOTHER.

MY LIFE IS BALANCED, ORGANIZED AND FILLED WITH JOY.

        I AM BLESSED WITH EMPLOYMENT THAT ALLOWS ME TO PROVIDE
FOR MY FAMILY.

I AM A LOVING, CARING AND GIVING FRIEND, WIFE & MOTHER.

I AM GIVING RAIN.

Weigh In for today: 184lbs

CoUnTiNg CaLoRiEs...

I am back to counting calories. I know you are probably thinking what I am thinking UGH! But I like counting calories for a couple of weeks. It helps we weed out all of the bad stuff until eventually I can just eat good things and it isn't soooo hard. Gets me used to looking at labels which I think is one of the best things you can do when changing eating habits. Those labels do not lie like your brain does when it is telling you to just keep eating eating eating. Those labels will tell you exactly how it is.

Also one thing that I believe is helping me is Oliver! On top of being adorable and me just wanting to keep up with him...he has started to eat table food and I am not going to be feeding him just anything. He will have all the proper nutrition which means so will Billy and I.

So here is to keeping the count!

Cheers!

The. Box.

I have been thinking a lot lately of the box of clothes that is sitting..lonely...in my closet. Mostly because we are moving in a couple of weeks and also because it depresses me that I still cannot wear them. They are my pre-marriage, pre-pregnancy clothes. I want so badly to be able to wear them. And at this point it has been so long since I have been able to that it iwll be like getting an entirely new wardrobe and who doesn't want that? But upon looking through these clothes a couple of weeks ago I also found my pre-pregnancy, pre-marriage box of unmentionables! It struck me that it is a little strange to be keeping old underwear! But I just can't bring myself to get rid of my 'sexy things'. From the time when I was thin and could be 'sexy' all the time with out even putting a lot of effort in. Now it is a whole big production....but that is another blog post lol.

It also made me realize a lot of people don't put a lot of thought into underwear when it comes to gaining a lot of weight. Or losing it! I know that I certainly didn't. I was very surprised after I had my son and tried to go back to my chongs (I really don't like the word thongs...it makes me thing of sticky dirty looking women...) to find that they didn't fit! I had to go out and buy larger underpants. But it wasn't only buying a larger size either. My new weight distribution just doens't work well with that...well that small amount of fabric! I work with a girl that 'just doesn't think it is right NOT to wear chongs ever and that anyone that doesn't wear them is just wrong. And while I love her I just have to think to myself...'Oh to be skinny again and think that my ass is going to stay the same shape for the rest of my life...'

These are really just random thoughts but when I was a cute thin girl I don't think I ever thought I would have a box of underwear in my closet that I can't wear and be wearing underwear that didn't make me feel randomly sexy or that matches my bra for that matter. I would have thought it was craziness too. Now I am all about comfort for my booty.

Back to the boxes though. I am so sad that I am moving this box with me. I should be giving away my fat clothes and unpacking my skinny jeans! I am not there yet though. I feel sometimes that along with boxing up my skinny clothes I boxed up a part of me...my self esteem and my random sexiness. I want that back. So I will continue working out...creating good life habits so that I can one day pull those sexy things and skinny things out of the box and enjoy them once again.

stressful situations

Do stressful situations drive you to eat? They do me.

I am just working on reminding myself of what is REALLY important and how I am going to feel after I bury my head in chocolate. Worse. I will feel worse if I eat eat eat.

So. Apples? HERE I COME!

she's back...

Well I am proud to say that I am back. I said in my last post that I was working hard at getting my mind right and back into the swing of things. I am back! yay! I am so energized and excited for this weight loss journey that I am on. I sound like a total cornball but oh well. =) I can't wait to step on that scale in December and know that I have accomplished something not many people do. I have set my goal of 70lbs and I am going to reach it! woot woot!

It is so boring being a downer that is sad about being chubby all the time! So here's a few things that I am doin...

Your Shape...

Now don't get me wrong Jenny McCarthy's voice can get pretty annoying and it is very picky about the colors you are wearing but watching myself with that little camera sure does keep me motivated...with every jiggle I work just a little bit harder. =-) I am looking for a REALLY good yoga video too. I think that yoga is something that I could grow to love. I just need the right video. I got some on netflix but they were lame so...we shall see about that.

I ♥ My Husband!

I also have had a great conversation with my husband and he is totally on board now. He is actually participating in my planning of meals and encouraging me. That is really nice. I really needed that. I can only be my own cheerleader for so long ya know? I think that everyone needs some one constant in their corner. Of course the hard work and determination has to come from with in but sometimes you just need that extra push to really get there....